Hi I hope you all had a happy Thanksgiving, or if you don’t celebrate it at all, a nice Thursday. Because this one ain’t happy, folks. This is best listened after a full stomach of food, maybe even sweets including a whole chocolate cake. Anyhow, listen to it at your own risk…
Here comes the always grumpy uncle Ray!
See the script here, also below:
Up next, “The View from the AT Field.” Brought to you by the totally honest and truthful folks at: www.believewhatyouhear.org, where everything you hear on the internet is 100% pure, unadulterated, and unedited truth. Let’s keep it real.
Today’s view: animated girls VS real girls
So, we Otaku men like animated girls. It’s true. I mean, they’re sitting right there on the screen and not going anywhere. They have distinctive personalities that don’t change or vary too much from what we expect, and most of the time, they always like one of the male characters we can try to identify with. Oh, and they don’t need to see Ferraris to get turned on and they don’t ask for diamonds. Their only flaw is that they’re 2D.
What about real girls? Well, they want popular, funny guys who look like Brad Pitt, Toby McGuire, Tom Cruise, George Clooney, and so on. If these real girls are Otaku, then they want these good looking thin bishonen in 2D world or even in 3D world. Thin is often the key word. Well, guess what? Most of us Otaku men don’t stand a chance because we park our asses in front of TVs and PC screens – we become heavy set. Watch animated girls whose aim is to please us makes a lot of us having trouble dealing with people, especially girls in real life. Oh, and most of us look like the prince while he was still in frog form.
What’s really fucking sad is that we Otaku men wouldn’t mind being with Otaku women, but a lot of these stuck up girls would still rather be with bishonen. Well, my advice for them is to look at themselves in the mirror and stop lying to themselves thinking they’re infinitely special.
We’re Otaku. We’ll assimilate you. Resistance is futile, and…
YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL! YOU’RE JUST LIKE THE REST OF YOUR SPECIE! Stop thinking that bishonen in real life is EVER going to pay attention to you! Well, he could. When he wants some free sex and then leaves you as you shall be.
The boos of our western audience isn’t going to make me change my statement, but really, if you think you’re so infinitely special and people should come and flock around you – this applies to both men and women, btw, in case you haven’t already realized – well, people don’t have to. Something in the genetic make up of humans says that loners must become outgoing and even try harder to get friends because most people are so self-absorbed in their problems to notice your loneliness and popular people often are the ones with cars, cell phone numbers, money, and aggressiveness when it comes to meeting people. Oh and they often play sports. That means most people will flock around those who can be more aggressive and talk all that trash so they feel special, because they’re with those who can make them look good. But I’m way off topic.
Anyhow, animated girls are great because each fits a certain wants that any number of Otaku men likes, and we can turn on these girls whenever we open that file, or pop in the DVD, and lo and behold, there’s Aoi! There’s Shana! And There’s Rei Ayanami! Convenient, eh?
Real girls aren’t simple like that. You call, but she thinks you’re geeky (never mind that you just may be the nicest and kindest man out there), and won’t talk to you. She’s dating that guy with the eyes of Justin Timberlake who makes her laugh like a giggling little girl.
But no matter, you pray. Maybe she’ll come around.
Well, dream on, son. What I often wish is that she gets knocked up and gets dumped. But the most likely case is probably that she breaks up with him (if they don’t get married), and she spills her heart out to you, son, and then she feels better and move on and find someone else – WHO WILL NOT BE YOU – to be with.
Here’s a tip: Tell her to talk to her girlfriends about her relationship troubles. Really, otherwise you’ll get hurt, and you won’t get anything from it. Save yourself the pain and just move on. I’m off topic again.
But you know what? Ink-chan or Yuna or Haruhi or Toa or whatever name that character has is waiting for you on your hard drive inside your PC or in that DVD case waiting for you to insert the DVD into a player, so what are you waiting for? Turn off this audio column and go watch the next episode already!
That concludes today’s View from the AT Field. Thanks for listening.
This segment was brought to you by the totally honest and truthful folks at: www.believewhatyouhear.org , where everything you hear on the internet is 100% pure, unadulterated, and unedited truth. Let’s keep it real.