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Bakemonogatari 07, 08 – Hate, just hate.

No, it’s not because of love.

No, it’s not because of love for someone else mixed with jealousy.

No, it’s not because of confusion; not really.

Yes, you want to kill him.

Yes, you want to kill her.

Yes, you want to search and destroy all that threatens “you”.

What is “you”?  What constitutes “you”? Or rather, let’s change the pronoun for a moment. What is “I”? What constitutes “I”? I am my mind, my heart, my soul, my body…and then, I’m what others see me. If no one is there to see me and nobody ever reacts to me (I don’t get people talk to me often), and let’s go a step further, if nothing in this existence reacts to me, then what? Let’s say, for example, I’m in a purely nothing space, not even having a mirror, will there be any meaning to this “I”?

Next, what threatens this “I”? Is it a “what”? Is it a “when”? Is it a “who”?

In the case of Kanbaru, it is “who”. “Who” threatens “her”; her existence is threatened by first by her classmates in elementary school. Then, intruded but not invaded by Senjogahara, and then, severely crushed by her and then severely invaded by Araragi’s friendliness with Senjogahara.

Kanbaru needs to be loved but she’s rejected; when she’s rejected, “she” is threatened. When “she” is threatened, “she” demands defense. In animals, “defense” often means lashing out at the other animal that is threatening the self’s existence with physical force. Things get more complex in human world, where the threat doesn’t always come from something physical, but often something emotional and mental.

Hell has no fury like a woman scorned, it has been said. But isn’t that true for men and women? Nothing hurts more than a rejection from your group, your “love”.

If those things threaten “I”, how will “I” react?

“I” want to destroy, to hurt, to lash back and make them feel the hurt. That’s the way. It isn’t because “I” love someone and that love cause me to react violently; it is all because of me feeling bad about myself. It isn’t even necessarily because the others pick on me, but it’s the reaction of “I” being plucked, smashed and destroyed within thanks to stimulation without; a perception that tears so much more at the soul.

Someone made sure that all those scenarios are possible in the human world so that we’d feel hurt; otherwise, nobody would react to any insults, rejections or anything else one can think of.

Maybe, just maybe, we need that someone to beat up; we need someone to lash out at; we need to see the guy responsible for making it all possible in the human world mocked, spit upon, beat up, kicked and smacked, whipped and having his skin torn off.

Yes, that sounds irresponsible enough – deal with it; deal with your own problems, they say. And perhaps that is the way to do it. Deal with it. Just deal with it. Do something to forget, move on, get on with your life.

That’s life. I accept it. However, “I” may not accept it so easily.

As a character, even if Kanbaru accepts her violent feelings and relishes at ripping the guts out of Araragi, she still has to learn to grow out of her instincts and she needs to be told “no. It won’t help.” It won’t make Senjogahara like you the way you want. It will only incur her wrath.

There is a time for a beating, and there is a time for piping down and learn to deal with it. There is a time for being whiny, and there is a time to grow into the next phrase (and perhaps, whine some more during that phrase).

…hmm, in any event…

Now, if all the artists can tell me all the artistic merits from all the camera shots, slides and texts, I’d greatly appreciate it because to be honest with you, I’m just not feeling it. It feels like overtly rich salad dressing on a small amount of vegetables or a pizza with so much topping and cheese that it overflows.

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