My PMX 2012 experience

Suffering from poverty, being a NEET, I almost gave up on PMX, but thanks to a local cosplay duo Takeriyas, I was able to go, and then on Saturday, I went to Vocaloid concert. The line was really long, and we even had to wait outside in a cold weather drizzling. My feet were shaking. My earlobes were hurting. That was really bad. What if we caught cold? How were they going to take responsibility? An old gentleman before me shared his Wall Street Journal with me, so we could kill the time. The paper had Petraeus scandal on the front page, not Obama’s victory. And then after two hours, the line finally started moving and we could get in, but no seat left, so we had to stand in the back. PMX wasn’t well organized this year, my impression.

There was a live dance performance first, people dressed up in vocaloid costumes and dancing to vocaloid music. And then, 3D Miku showed up on a projector screen, and danced to vocaloid numbers. I especially loved Miku dancing to the number Eazy Dance. And she was really sexy. A lot of panchira, yes of course, fan service for otakus, and then, the way she moved was damn sexy, like swaying her hip. I think Afro-oriented dance is sexy. Yes, like Afro-brazilian Samba, Afro-cubano dances. I know South Korea recently had hip dance by KARA, but not as provocative as Afro-dancers (not ethnically but culturally). And Eazy Dance is an R&B number, oh yes, sounded like New Jack Swing from the 90s. Yes, old school. Yes, I used to love Utada Hikaru a lot. Her songs were really really sexy. R&B female vocal is so sexy, so it reminded me of how much I loved Utada in the past. First time listening to Utada I thought she was an utterly sexy girl, but she was just a tiny average looking Japanese girl, which was astounding. Yes, this taught me how important voice is! Yes, just like female seiyuu! Female vocal with minor pentatonic scale is probably the sexiest on earth. Yes, sexuality is more than sex, it’s the erotic aura that exudes. Yes, vocaloid concert was totally a sexy experience, or to borrow The Paper‘s word, totally “orgasmic experience.”

And then on Sunday, I went to Moon Stream live with people from a local vocaloid club. Oh Yes, Moon Stream is totally visual-kei, so a lot of fan girls were there being moonstruck. Wow, that atmosphere… Oh yes, I think bass-player attracted girls attention the most. Wow, I thought bass player won’t get any girls. When I was in high school, I was a bass player in a rock band, and I didn’t get any muchachas while other three members, vocal, drum, guitar got their sexual desire constantly satisfied. Riajuu should have exploded! That’s why I vowed not to play bass guitar again. And when Hirano Aya‘s scandal broke out, it proved my point. She got laid with all of her band members but a bass player. Yes, bass player don’t get any!!! A fall-guy, joker, fool. But this night, it totally overthrew that premise. I want to play bass again! Girls…, yes, when Satsuki threw his T-shirt at the audience, girls were grabbing onto it. And I was really shocked when some girl dived in front of me. I believe Tomo threw a pick, and then the girl was looking for the pick. Wow, girls can be this crazy? Man, visual-kei… I wish I were talented like them. Music is really intense but beautiful at the same time. And they were all ikemen, I wish I was ikemen… Oh, yes. American girls believe in indirect skinship! I thought that was only a Japanese thing, but American girls also believe in that! New discovery! Indirect skinship! Next time when I play bass guitar, I will throw a pick at girls! Or lollipop! Like L’Arc En Ciel! Yes, I will throw a lolipop licked by my tongue! Yes, they will get pregnant by just licking my lollipop! They will beg me, “I want to have your baby!” Today’s immaculate conception. Ultimate indirect peropero! Perorist resorting to perorism.

Ah next day, I went to fashion show. I was in the line for an hour long, PMX delayed the fashion show for an hour, which was totally horrible and no apology whatsoever to us. Very unprofessional. And I didn’t have Wall Street Journal this time! Vocaloid disaster and this? Someone should take responsibility for this. That’s what AX did, their CEO quit. I hope that won’t happen again the next year. And then, finally I made it to Lolita fashion show. Awesome. So adorable. Girls are just heavenly. Satsuki and Tomo from Moon Stream joined as models walking down the runaway. That was pretty neat. I wish I were handsome like them, so I don’t need to be kimo-ota! They didn’t look like they were outsiders, they totally fit in with these Lolita models! How come I wasn’t born feminine? I wish I could be feminine or ultimately shōjo!

Events themselves were really awesome. It’s just the administrative side of PMX that sucked. As a music lover, it was great and more than satisfying. Totally great. Awesome experience!

Author: Monsieur LaMoe

A refugee from Japan. Live in NAFTA. Get hooked on Moe. Moe is opium? Twitter: @MonsieurLamoe

10 thoughts on “My PMX 2012 experience

  1. Yeah, definitely it was fun, surrounded by fan girls screaming, I know you would have loved this concert! Yup, basist gets laid, that was the revelation!

  2. @Paper I thought orgasm was public domain. So all onanists of the world have to pay you? LOL

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