Site icon Anime Diet

Claymore 18,19 Parody – The Chaotic War of Cirumcision in the North

clare-and-jean-coming-to-north.jpgClare and Jean were heading toward the North to join their comrades.

Their mission is to participate in the Great War against the uncircumcised men and the heathen wenches who aid them.

“Everyone! Today we’re going against the first wave of the uncircumcised heathen swines!

“These three are known as: Hot Erect Head, Turtle Head, and the Blind Fold!

“All right! Ladies! Let’s get us some wieners!”


“All right! That’s it! I tried talking to these women first but no more Mr. Nice erectus for me! GARRRR!”

“Hmph. This is why I like being Turtle Head…Behold my turtle head powering up!!! Mwahahaaha!!!!”

“All right ladies, time to cut off their willies…I mean their skins!”

“What, it’s not full moon yet?”

“I can’t wait to have me some sausage!”

“Save the balls for me!”

“Hahaha! Look, now I have tentacles! And they’re all uncirumcised!

“That’s it. If you want to cut of my skin, I’ll cut off their heads!”

“Curse you! You uncircumcised heathen swine!”

All the women wanting a piece of this action!

“Look at me! I have a huge and smiling turtle head! Come and get some!”

“All right ladies, step back, this baldy is mine!”

“No so fast! I have made you hot and bothered with the power of my smiley head! Now you can’t even stand up!”

“Damn you, captain jack! Damn you!”

“It looks bad for her. Let’s help her grease that axle~” “OK!”

On the other side of the town…

“Jean! Hurry up! We can’t fight back the power of his thick skinned tentacles any longer! We…We’re feeling hot and bothered!”

“Don’t worry, my spinning circumciser is almost ready!”

“Hahaha! My peters are too fast for you! You’re pathetic! You can’t even please a boy with you skills!”

From the other side of the town, Clare said: “I thought I heard someone talking shit about me!”

“All right! TIme to circumcise you! Hyyyaaaaa!

“Ouch, this turtle head is tough…I’ve never tried to circumcise this kind before!”

“What, you can’t get the skin off? Never been with a man before?”

“Well, unlike you, Madam Muscle Dominatrix, I actually use my skills!”

“No, wait! Please! Not the head~just the skin, just the skin!

“AHHHHHH!!! My salami!!!”

“Well, looks like the rocket has taken off.”

“Mwahahaha! My turtle head can fly! I’ll perform uncircumcised coitus somewhere else!”

“Not so fast, Mr. Willie!” “I haven’t eaten all day and this sausage is looking mighty good!”

“Let’s chop soy it!”

“You do that, I just want to slice it in half nice and easy, and I don’t even have to move my arm!”

“GAHHHHH!!! My preciousss meeeaaaat~…”

Back to Jean. “Hmm, I didn’t find your wee-wee. Just as I suspected, you’re a transsexual masochistic bug! It’s time to put whatever left down there in the grinder!”

“Let me cut off his fake uncircumcised johnsons!”

“Wait for us!” “I wanna slice and dice this baloney for my sandwich!

“No I’m still a virgin!!!!!”

On Miria’s side.

“It’s time to circumcise! Die for your insolence, you heathen swine!”

“GAH!!! My Hot Erecting Head…”

“Hmm, I thought cutting the off the head is the same thing as circumcising the skin. Oh well better not tell the rest of the girls, least they pissing their tights laughing.

“What, are you a virgin? Miria?”

“I’m gonna kill you! Helene!”


And the day is saved! Thanks to – the circumcisers we know as the Claymores!

Exit mobile version