Tag Archives: guts

The Anime Diet State of the Union Address

The Anime Diet State of the Union Address

– By Ray Hu, representing all for this moment in time.

February 26, 2010

My fellow Otakus:

As Anime Diet enters its third year, I’m reminded of the tracks that we have carved in the history of anime fandom. As fellow anime lovers, or otakus, if you so dare, we have been fighting. Yes, fighting. Just as you have struggled through the last decade engaged in mortal combat with changes, finance issues, work, school, relationships, and any other seemingly trivial but strong foes. You have waged war with the enemies with all your heart, your might and your strength, and at the end of the grueling match, you have come out on top, and that’s why you’re reading and hearing this. I congratulate you for your bravery and resourcefulness in managing social upheavals as well as other concerns that have been of the utmost importance in your lives. As for us,

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Splogging has officially become a crime punishable by having your guts eaten by yoma.

From The Diet 3 Daily

Oct. 13, The Diet 3, Atlantis. After numerous attempts to flush out the rats known as sploggers with Eva Unit 15’s, Ikari “Mike” Gendo finally decided to institute an iron law.

“All criminals found splogging will first be strip naked. Cuss words and other inappropriate words will be written on their backs, in French. Afterwards, these criminals will be given PVC claymores and be sent to the heart of Singapore, where yomas exist.” Commented Misato “Jeane” Katsuragi, the city of The Diet 3’s official spokeswoman.

Yomas are known as beings that live by feeding on human internal organs. It is rumored that livers and testicles are favored by yomas of both sexes.

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