Secret Santa Survival Guide; Part Pedobear

You’re passed the hat full of all your anime club’s member’s names and you take a folded piece of paper out…

… darn it! You picked the pedobear of your crew. What in the world are you going to get them?

Here’s a guide to help you out;

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Boku no Pico… yes, yes. The ultimate “are you f’real?” pedobear fare. I haven’t seen it, and no one I know will admit they’ve watched it either. Leads me to believe this is undoubtedly the perfect anime for the Pedobear in your life.

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As the youngest member of the Azumanga Dioh! crew, she seems to be a fan favorite among many. Thank goodness she’s got friends to protect her, though if you feel up for it you can place her into the arms of the Pedobear. She won’t put up a fight.

Criminal Girls for the PSP Train your little girls to do bad things within settings such as a dungeon and when they disobey you, you get to punish them. This game also features interactive “rest” features. It’s really an adorable game, though I don’t think a Pedobear could ask for more.

Rilakkuma Room Shoes (Bear Slippers) Help them creep around more quietly by giving the soft house slippers in the shape of, what else: a bear.

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Sometimes, it’s good to know that little kids don’t like to be messed with. Remind the Pedobear of this with Gunslinger Girl which depicts young girls who were “saved” and trained by a government who brainwashes them along with handing them over to an officer in the force. Often the little girls become obsessed with the men. This is not the manga for the faint of heart, it gets quite gruesome and deranged at times.

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