Oohoo, my first flammer! Banzai! Banzai! Banzai!

Wow, finally I got flamed! Woohoo! Finally, some dumb loser who can’t spell and defend that by saying: “btw my grammer and spelling suck so i dont need any1 to tell me cuz not every1’s first language is english especially when every1 here is watching japanese anime and i dont feel like spell checking.” — GreedoShotFirst

Let’s back up a little bit. Last year I did some reviews for El Cazador and my clearly intended for humor reviews were sharp and unreserved, to say at least. Those of you who understand my style know that. Most people that saw my reviews seemed to agree with me (correct me if you’re not one of the most people). But anyway, one year later, when I was wondering why is it that Mike got flamed for something trivial but I never got any, well, today, I finally received two in a row!

This guy, GreedoShotFirst, seemed to have some good points, “Every1 has good points about this show but i must say that i 100% agree with the 1st comment. “Sorry but I think you didn’t get the spirit of this episode, not to mention the entire anime”, and also “But my fav of all is the soundtrack it fits perfect for this anime during each scene it sets the mood and also flows with the anime itself. I liked how this anime differed from the other 2 it rly takes a new light into the “guns with girls” scheme. On the other hand main character development could of done a lot better.”

Those were solid points and I was preparing to respond in kind and answer his arguments in a rational and intelligent manner, when he came with this:

“man the more reviews i read from you the more worthless i think of you. We got rambo/Drew Carey doing these reviews. Nothing but an action whore and worthless comedian.”

Well (not caring much for Rambo and Drew Carey), for anyone who starts a comment with that, how could I resist striking him down with vegeance? So I had my own nasty, Johannes Krauser II-style comments ready, when he came up with that golden quote in the first paragraph of this article.

Now, I’ll be the first to admit, for 12 years I didn’t know English well because I didn’t become a English speaker until later. So I can understand that not everyone’s first language is English, and that’s fine. Also, because this is a blog and not technically an online Multimedia magazine like we want to believe, we honestly don’t care much about anyone’s grammar and spelling here (only Mike does). But, this guy, GreedoShotFirst, wrote something inflammatory, and then as a clear gesture of cowardice, left his email as thisreviewsucks@hotmail.com, which is clearly not a real address, came back and started explaining why I or anyone really should care about his comments, which ended up with “the more worthless i think of you” as the starting point, with “btw my grammer and spelling suck so i dont need any1 to tell me.”

That’s pure gold. I tend to say if you don’t know that this is a English-only blog site with shock-jock (very, very, very minor shock jock) humors and you can’t really read or write English well, at least come up with intelligent comments without attacking someone personally in the comments section, as somebody did to one of our other writers.

Now yeah, once again, GreedoShotFirst had some great comments and I’ll admit that he had a few good points. For anyone who doesn’t realize that I was poking fun at the show mercilessly, he or she may get extremely angry. But it seems like he knew, “…We got rambo/Drew Carey doing these reviews. Nothing but an action whore and worthless comedian.

Well, some of you probably will think or even say: “Let it go.” Others: “You’re a troll/asshole/etc.” Even more others will say: “You should take it in and don’t say a thing about it.” And many other comments that will support this guy, but see, that ain’t my style. We (not just I) are providing free service here for your entertainment. If you’re not entertained, then I say: “Well, look here sir, like I give a shit what your think of me anyway.”

But you know, it does irritates a little so I just have to write this article for my own entertainment. After all, the first person that got a real flame was the nicest guy on the site, Mike, and not me, and this flame is long, long overdue. I’ve already commented back properly to GreedoShotFirst, who probably ran off without seeing my replies knowing his pride and self esteem and will get publicly raped by Krauser II, so as for my personal enjoyment, I will leave this great and glorious day with this:

Ray AKA Krauser III – shut the fuck up and who gives a good god damn about a pig slut like you anyway, you cowardly sack of shit! Don’t make me go public rape on you after smashing your head with the Guitar of Cruelty! Then I’ll make a French Dip Sandwich with your blood and guts! Gwahahahahahahahhaha!

Have a nice night, everyone, and thank you, GreedoShotFirst, for your kindly concerns. Good night.

[Disclaimer – the above comedy bits are inspired by Detroit Metal City and do not in anyway, shape, or form represent real life behaviors, actions, and events. The views of Raymond Hu do not necessarily represent the view of Anime Diet, its affiliates, and anyone else involved. Thank you.]

19 thoughts on “Oohoo, my first flammer! Banzai! Banzai! Banzai!”

  1. Welcome to the club. On average, I get about 3 abusive comments a day! Most come from my post on Koizora, where I have been called everything frm Nazi to gay fag, ugly, racist, Japanese hater, American and many worse names. I didn’t respond to any of them because I think it’s funny and it gets me traffic.

    By the way, if you only got one, it means you’re not mean enough. Try harder, insulting pretty boys is an effective tactic.

  2. @ tj han – you’re right, I’m just way too nice. Thanks for the suggestion, I shall try harder next time! XD

    Wow, but 3 per day is a lot.

  3. hahaha… i got my first flame last week for the same thing, mistyped thing. i just told him “aww… thank you for making me realize that i am not such a loser even though i spend a lot of time blogging and making omakes, at least i don’t go around the internet making fun of others for slight lapses” or something like that. XD

    but yeah… he has a lot of balls to say that you should improve on spelling and grammar who spells everyone as every1. what annoys me about this type of flamer is that they make it seem like they’re doing us a favor by reading our posts.

  4. @ biankita – well, yeah he also hated my review so much that he felt I really should give a shit about his opinions of me. Also, do we care if these people ever read our posts? NAH!!!

  5. Agreed on the issue of English. It’s not everyone’s first language but there’s a difference between English not being your first language and descending into newbish AOL/txt speak. That’s just laziness, as is the case here.

    I recall a guy getting quite abusive on my blog a while back – I wrote “did you forget to write the end tag for a strikethrough?” because his whole comment was written in strikethrough. I got “Don’t be an ass. Fix it.” for my troubles. Being the blogging newbie I was at the time, I politely replied again that it was his mistake and I did indeed fix the code of his comment. Then I thought:

    Fuck you. This is MY blog. That was YOUR mistake and I’ll be damned if someone strolls onto MY blog, uses MY bandwidth and MY server space to order me about. Fuck. You.

    Unfortunately the asshole never came back but suffice to say when I get streams of gibberish or “stop posting spoilers!” I treat them with the contempt they deserve and delete them. Actually I’ve had precious little dorama on my blog so maybe my writing isn’t contentious enough…

    I’ve been reading your blog for a long time now and I’ve never thought you deserve to be flamed, but this is a pretty entertaining way of countering it. I’m not familiar with Detroit Metal City though, to my shame. :(

  6. @ Stifler -yeah, the drama is over. I also wish that it would last longer. Hey, it can be fun!

    @ Martin – well, thank you so much for reading and bearing with me (Mike always writes good stuff). But yeah, remember a blog is NOT a public space and hence, you can counter these people anyway you want. As for Detroit Metal City, it’s not for everyone but it sure is a hell lot of laughs for me.

    Here’s the link to download the torrents for DMC: http://www.animesuki.com/series.php/1283.html

    I hope you’ll enjoy it as a pure comedy.

  7. Goodness, Martin, you need to watch Detroit Metal City! XD

    This was a great funny posting, and I agree with everyone on the matter that trolls should just be laughed at and/or ignored, and all is fine :)

  8. @ jpmeyer – that means you have a rich audience, though not in quite a good way in this case, I suppose.

    @ Sasa – yeah, I know. But it’s my first flame! Woohoo! I’ve never gotten any before!

    @ Martin – Join the rank of DMC heads! XD

  9. @ Rah’ra – Thanks! Glad to be in!
    @ Qwerty – the moral of the story? “Don’t be an flaming idiot at Anime Diet or you shall be treated like one.” I guess?

  10. My favorite insult of all time is this (reproduced in all its shoddy glory):

    07:52 24/Jan/2009 nicolas946 : look dumb azz yu dont even have intellinge to understand

    Looking at it still makes me chuckle.

  11. @ moritheil – ever notice these morons are always too cowardly to leave their real email address and s/n? I always do, because I welcome any comeback comments. Flamers are ball-less losers or spineless worms after all.

  12. Well, I think of it this way.  Even if you don’t agree with someone, a rational mind realizes that there is nothing productive to be gained by flaming, and there is much to lose: you could irritate a future boss or a friend of a friend, or even if not, people you know could see your rage years later and lose some respect for you.  (Christian Bale’s infamous diatribe, turned into an mp3, comes to mind.)

    Therefore anyone who flames has failed not one, but multiple mental levels of safeguards and self-checking.  And if this is true, their minds in general are likely to be a little lacking in other respects as well.  I’m not going to say it’s not tempting even to the best of us, but in general rational people refrain from it.

Leave a Reply