From the editor’s desk at the Diet 3 Daily –
The investigators from the Diet 3 Headquarters, which is located somewhere underground Tokyo, launched an investigation on the recently completed Federation secret weapon, also know as Gundam, a Mobile Suit not too much unlike our own Rayder’s Dark Custom Suit, and discovered a shocking truth – unlike what’s stated in the Federation Gundam Operation Manual, the Mobile Suit, which is currently located on the not–so–secret-facility on Odaiba Island, is not made from Luna Titanium, which the scientists at Anaheim Electronics, a weapons manufacturing company from the future, synthesized at the Moon Base, but made of some kind of 20th-century plastic material know as PVC.
“Frankly, I’m shocked, just shocked.” Said Rayder, after leaping out the cockpit of his suit, tumbled and rolled in the air, and then made a perfect-10 landing on the launch deck of the Diet 3’s mobile battle cruiser, the Giga J, named after its huge turrets, especially its main particle cannon directly poking out the anterior of the ship. He then shook his head in utter disbelief.
“Ha! I knew nobody does giant mechas like I can! Or rather like what my institution can!” said Ikari “Mike” Gendo, who smirked with his usual posture behind his desk. “Think the SD will finally yield, Fuyusuki?” He said, apparently to the person behind him.
“Yes, I believe it will,” said Mike C, his roommate. “Oh, by the way, stop staying up so late every night and watching that scene of Asuka kissing Shinji over and over.” He paused and coughed. “It’s annoying listening to the same whiny girl every night while trying to get to sleep.”
Ikari “Mike” Gendo showed his usual wolfish smile but said nothing.
We tried to interview Amuro Ray but he was getting his ass chewed out online by all the Zeonists. “You suck! You get a giant-sized PVC for a mecha?” one Zeonist commented.
Some other harsh criticisms are as follows:
“I’m naked wearing only a red Speedo! Amuro Ray, I’m now three times as fast as before! Mwa hahahahaha watch me shoot!”
“Oh look, my mecha is made of titanium and ceramic composite! You’re so doomed, doomed I say!”
“Ooh, look at my new Minovsky reactor! And it’s painted red, too! Look at me going not 3 times as fast, but 300 times as fast!”
Amuro Ray only said this: “Even my father didn’t say all these silly things to me!”
Our investigator was tempted to slap his face nonetheless.
More information is to come.