Stand Alone Complex Crimes running rampant in Japan.

From the Diet 3 Daily (formally know as believewhatyouhear.org news) –

It appears that another teenager tried to kill his dad, but fortunately for the father, this attempt was unsuccessful.

In recent days, after watching Ghost in the Shell the TV series, a lot of crimes were committed.

However, there are no original crimes committed in the wake of these Ghost in the Shell episodes – just believed crimes. But there are copycat crimes that emulates crimes that are not there realistically.

Our agency is still trying to learn what exactly “Stand Alone Complex” is all about. But we speculate that Section 9 is already involved in the investigation.

Two real victims of these crimes are the anime “School Days” and “Higurashi”. Both had their latest or last episodes canceled.

Recently, the Diet 3 Daily has received a death threat, saying: “I AM GOING TO KILL THE BASTARD WHO KEEPS ON POSTING USELESS NEWS AND INFORMATION ABOUT SHOWS THAT NOBODY GIVE A F*&%K! BE AWARE, RAYMOND! DON’T MAKE ME PULL A STABBY STABB ON YOU!”

However, our news source and other new sources haven’t reported any stabbing crimes yet. We did report some people who used cyber paper fans smacking on other people’s head for memory stealing from cyber brain crimes, in which the only thing that the victims could remember is that the perpetrator screamed: “NANDEYANEN!” All the way down the streets after committing the crime.

We would like to advice the citizens to wear special purple safety helmets and watch out for Japanese folks with tattoos eating boxes of Takoyaki and speaking in Kansai-accent Japanese.

“I want to whack all these TV station guys,” said a male who appears to be 35-years old without wearing a wedding ring but wearing a “BURN IN HELL! MAKOTO!” t-shirt and a pair of greasy jeans. “One million gigaslaves up there in the arses shall do the job quite nicely.” He said with a Alucard-mockery-British accent.

More details are forthcoming.

______________________________________________________________________________

Michael Huang also contributed to this story.

Leave a Reply